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snakelikecharmer:

parisjemm:

A relationship is like a house

If a lightbulb goes out, you don’t buy a new house, you just change the lightbulb.

Unless that house is a lying whore

Then you burn the fucker to the ground and buy a better house with lights that you can fucking count on.

This took the best possible turn.

(via v-o-o-d-o-o--c-h-i-l-d)

iamsmallcat:

the last one killed me

(Source: tastefullyoffensive, via v-o-o-d-o-o--c-h-i-l-d)

ladygolem:

danyanimated:

So I was writing a small paper in Microsoft Word and the program suddenly crashed (I saved a couple minutes before, thank god) and I get this message in the corner of my screen two seconds afterward

image

what the fuck

ditched

(via cheetahgirl69420)

themalkingjay:

me not shaving my legs has literally nothing to do with feminism and literally everything to do with me being lazy

(Source: devinnnc, via cheetahgirl69420)

chomei:

chomei:

heterosexuals are so boring. like what do they do

image

(via cheetahgirl69420)

croptop2014:

j5h:

imagine having sex with a ghost and then someone walks into your room and they see your asshole widening and narrowing for no reason

imagine praying to God and going to church

(Source: j6, via v-o-o-d-o-o--c-h-i-l-d)